You held on to a love for your sister, and wouldn’t let your self love somebody else for over 30 years! yea, i thought that too… brother/sister or not, its not healthy either way. Then I had to go back and read it again, imagining the LW as a man. I’m not qualified to help you in that way, and, even if I were, I couldn’t do it in a single advice column. I was quickly moved into a hospital bed and they immediately started running tests on me. call-me-hobo Please help. that doesn’t COUNT, and b. it’s disturbing. Just a little bit of background, I'm 17 and my sister is 19. jlyfsh Now I dont say I know this for sure yet but a question. katie Iku was confused by Yori's attitude. I love sleeping up in my old childhood bedroom, feeling like I’m 10 years old again and everything is taken care of. Good luck! So if I wanted to say “What Emma Said”, I would write it “WES”. So LW, if you love her, you need to think about her happiness as well, which she’s made quite clear lies elsewhere, not with you. I agree that the LW needs to think and work on their own reasons for being involved romantically.. And to be honest, I wonder if they actually will take onboard the advice given here. Wondering what other commenters think? Find yourself a good psychologist or maybe a clinical social worker (look for an LCSW after the name). In a good strong relationship you can still stand on your own two feet even without that other person. He feels that she prioritises their kids over him and says they don’t have sex anymore. To be so emotionally codependent on someone that you lose your job? February 25, 2014, 12:18 pm. It was amazing. February 25, 2014, 10:24 am. You can form other friendships and even relationships with other people. LW, the problem you have is normally, people lean on loved ones and family after a break up and because of this taboo, you cannot tell people what happened or how it affects you. February 25, 2014, 10:34 am. 748. Cancel Post. If you have the means- get to a therapist. I kind of immediately thought of those while reading this letter. Really take some time looking for someone reputable and find someone you feel safe and comfortable with, because this is going to take a lot of time to work though. Now you move on and get support in understanding yourself and why this untypical relationship has meant so much, too much, to you. I think that the maybe taboo of the relationship really spurred or deepened the strength of your codependency on each other (It’s me and her against the world, No one understands our love, etc, etc). They’ve been having difficulties in their marriage for a while. lemongrass I’ve fallen deeply in love with my sister’s husband and don’t know what to do. Friends & Family CONFESSION 1.6 years ago By Anonymous. Tell your sister that you two must get back to a normal brother/sister relationship. Join Napster and play your favorite music offline. That’s why I love my sister so very much! The rapist in you is coming out. This was a long, complicated relationship and you’re in mourning now that it’s over. Edit- It doesn’t look like they are going to tell us lemon. Sure, the later age difference isn’t that huge, but he’d been “away from home” for five years–the implication is with minimal contact, right?–so these were, again, the crushy feelings of a teenager no matter how old she actually was. We and our partners will store and/or access information on your device through the use of cookies and similar technologies, to display personalised ads and content, for ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. And get help. bethany LlamaPajamas Not sure why. LW, I think you are downplaying your personal responsibility in this. ktfran February 25, 2014, 2:31 pm, At this point, you just have to sit down and have that long awkward talk with yourself – you know, where you digest these facts: it’s *you*, not them, it *is* personable, and there’s nothing nobody can do about it. It doesn’t surprise me that her new lover is also an older man (the “eleven years older” strikes me as a bit defensive–seven years, eleven years, not a huge difference, sorry). She was like a sister to me. She wrote me letters and made promises we would never break up and told me that I was her soul-mate. OK, so why are people thumbing down this too? February 25, 2014, 10:58 am. So we have a LW who has been attracted to someone who was, at the beginning, MUCH younger (“since we were both young”–HOW young? In this case, I don’t really think it matters all that much how we spin in… Still not good! 4 Comments newest; oldest; most replies ; most popular; sdf. My world is destroyed. The teenaged sister who loved her brother “differently” (and the “she told her friends” angle always strikes me as sort of wishful thinking) had to have been at most, like, seventeen, and probably younger–a. And as others have mentioned, the sexual relationship seems to have begun when (at best) the LW was 23-27 and the sister was 16-20. Hope you find peace with this. Really think about what makes you happy about yourself and start doing those things. I would never shame someone about their feelings, but your actions are very suspect in that early liaison. And respect the boundaries your sister is trying desperately to create with you. Go for a walk and get some sun and fresh air. Welcome! Mwahahahahahaha. WWS and WCS – break off all ties and find a good therapist. I know it's wrong but it is hard for me to resist. February 25, 2014, 10:18 am. I'm in love with my sister, it's true, I am! So, if and when the LW decides to see someone, if the first one totally sucks, I don’t want him to give up. WWS. Don’t be inveigled by her tearful calls – that’s wishful thinking. I know most people will find this disgusting, but what I wanted to really ask if someone else (please females only) has fallen this hard for their sister. I've only really connected to one person in life, and that's my sister. meadowphoenix February 25, 2014, 3:24 pm, “Please help me. I had such a kick ass streak going. Please explain yourselves down-thumbers. You need to cut off contact. It’s a moment away from bills and work and 12-dollar cocktails that I have to scream at a bartender to get. katie Heartbreaking! Just that she said she loved him differently when she was a teenager. Thanks for visiting! If she is depressed, tell your dad she needs more support. I have 13 different doctors came in and out of the room in 5 minutes. I am crushed. Information about your device and internet connection, including your IP address, Browsing and search activity while using Verizon Media websites and apps. Still doesn’t make sense to me. ----- I woke up to several people standing around me; there was Frankie, Dilan, Stormy, a doctor, Kylie, Louis, Nicki, Harry and Marcus. good man Sisishot Jun 26 2014 5:43pm FLAG. maybe not?) I don’t think that’s a huge difference at that age. Wait, I’m confused. February 25, 2014, 10:21 am. That was a pretty dark time in my life and my faith really helped me through it. * Alternative Title: I'm In Love With My Little Sister / BokuImo * Genre: Drama, Romance * Film Date: January, 2006 * Description: Yori and his twin sister Iku used to be very close as children but lately Yori has grown colder toward Iku and is always eager to stay away from her. I'm in love with my sister I guess. You had the higher level of responsibility. It would be interesting to hear! bagge72 I'm in love with my sister, she is romantic, man claims. LW pretty much threw out there they are religious (or at least on board with praying)…so the advice is VERY relevant. I assumed he moved away for 5 years after college, which would make him 26 and her 19. I’m sorry you feel this way LW, but you need to get yourself to therapy. Copyright © 2021 Dear Wendy. Description: Little Jade has been studying to be a magician!She decides to go show her stepbro what she's learned. If there is no one, you might want to work with your therapist on why this is. I'm in Love With My Little Sister (2005) 05/18/2005 (JP) Romance, Animation, Drama 50m User Score. I’m going to call that the “Grassy Knoll Thumber Theory.”. What Wendy Said. Since that day I've been in love with her and I'm sure she feels the same way about me. I think it is a man, since he says his sister is with another man, instead of moved in with a man. But then the married couple made me rethink things. (I’m kidding, I get it.). LW, please find yourself a good therapist. I even thought ANOTHER man meant the sister went BACK to men at one point. February 25, 2014, 11:37 pm. Join Napster and play your favorite music offline. We have always been very close. The feelings you have for your sister are not healthy. All rights reserved. Even though therapists aren’t supposed to judge, some still do. The scene with the brother and sister in the hotel room, having sex until they were both too exhausted and sore and emotionally drained in an effort to “cure” their feelings for each other? Find out more about how we use your information in our Privacy Policy and Cookie Policy. Such a relationship didn’t arise thanks to any parents of the year — you can count on that. February 25, 2014, 11:01 am. My only other guess is that some rando is showing up and downthumbing sporadically just to sow discord. — Missing Sis. Vote for our March/April Book Club Selection, Updates: “Not a Secret” Responds (Again), Poll: “Should Partner B Be Allowed to Eat Beef in the House if It’s Against Person A’s Religion?”, “My ‘High-Society’ Boyfriend’s Gifts Are So Cheap!”. Teenaged girls who have feelings for older men–whether family figures or teachers–and then end up involved with them never seem to me to be in a healthy adult relationship; it’s more a wish-fulfillment left over from childhood. are you serious ?? I know this is hard, but you have accept that she has moved on and you need to take steps to do the same. Whenever I’m feeling down you cheer me up. 0. I know it in my heart she feels trapped by this guy. Speak up you down thumbers! You need professional help to get yourself to healthy mental state. Laura Hope You can be helped. This letter made me so sad. February 25, 2014, 9:26 am. You need professional help to get through this. Please make your emotional and mental help your number one priority. She told me she loves me and wants to have sex with me. Or I could be wrong. She told me she can't help who she falls in love with. I'm 10 and want to love my 5 year old sister im a girl Trinity Thompson Dec 12 2012 2:49pm FLAG. If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at [email protected] (be sure to read these guidelines first). I don’t feel like I want to live anymore. You are unhealthily fixated on your half-sister. February 25, 2014, 12:01 pm. Please pray for me — pray that she wants to get back together again”. February 25, 2014, 1:40 pm, This makes me very sad. One thing the LW doesn’t seem to realize is that although HE may have been blissfully happy when they were together, she quite obviously was not. February 25, 2014, 3:16 pm. You can replace the letter of the commenter you agree with in the middle — W__S. Overview. February 25, 2014, 10:38 am. She wanted out and she got out. I’m not even sure why I bothered pointing it out, since it really doesn’t matter. Therapy all around, please. it’s hard though because we have zero frame of reference for how old he actually was when he left home. February 25, 2014, 9:57 am. Two hours away, in the home he shared with his wife, Brian experienced the same thing. That’s the bad news. Addie Pray Just wanted to tell you you’re on my mind and I love you, Sister! My first down thumb. I had never felt that loved in all my life. I'm wondering if you are taking the caring nature of your sister and making her a sort of "pseudo-girlfriend" or "surrogate girlfriend". Good luck! What I can tell you is that your life isn’t over. Instead of trying to be with her as a partner just try and be a big brother. Hmm.. that's vert interesting becase you see, I almost have the same problem. For anyone else I’d say recruit a friend to help with those steps, but I can imagine that given the unusual circumstances of this situation, it’s hard to bring anyone else into the inner circle to help. We have a relationship going and we don't date other people, so I guess we are in a kind of monogamous thing. She is perfect. Dilan walked over to a girl name Nina who went to our school. Originally serialized in Shōjo Comic, the individual chapters were published in ten tankōbon volumes by Shogakukan from May 2003 until August 2005. February 25, 2014, 9:25 am. Y’don’t say!). honeybeenicki Those and also “The Hotel New Hampshire” by John Irving, for something a little more literary. His only worry is that the rest of the family will get to know and things may boomerang on the two lovers. I love you, Sister! February 25, 2014, 10:14 am. I actually thought the LW was a woman, though I’m not sure why. I want to 1000th the “find a competent professional” comments and also the need for self-reflection on your part in getting this whole thing going. Then one day she said she wasn’t happy and we split up. That’s really really unhealthy. Depending on whether it was “about 5 years” and how young a teen she was. interesting and i read it as he left home when she was a teenager, so he would have been older than 18! LlamaPajamas Yahoo is part of Verizon Media. I think this happens more than people realize. SpaceySteph Ignoring the whole half-sister thing, it is not healthy to be this dependent on another person. I just wanted to point this out, because A. a lot of people will unfortunately find this LW’s situation slightly taboo. Oh noooooo! You two have spent the last two decades folded in on each other, and you’re definitely going to need a professional to help you. I’ve had nothing but positive experiences since with the two I went to thereafter. DEAR DEIDRE: MY wife has agreed I should be her sister’s sperm donor so she can have the baby she longs for, but she has no idea that I am in love with her sister and have been for years. Eventually I had some closure. A first step, LW, is to come out of the clouds and recognize that, while the relationship may have seemed like utter perfection to you, it wasn’t to her – otherwise she would not have broken up with you and moved on to someone else. Laura Hope Wendy (not Wendy) But now, over a year out of the break up, I would be the first to admit the relationship was unhealthy and I was too willing to give up who I was just to be with him…, GatorGirl I woukdn't say I'm in love with my step sister but I do find her extremely attractive. lemongrass February 25, 2014, 12:28 pm. I've been feeling this way for a while now, since October last year, when I was bedridden with a fever, she took care of me, for a whole week she stayed home with me, fed me, washed me, and dressed me. lets_be_honest Re: I’m In Love With My Sister by Yusufisraelj(m): 1:57pm; Viicfuntop: YOu are a fuccking weirdo. You can read about me here, peruse the archives here and read popular posts here. i think him being a teenager when he left makes it even worse. Here’s the thing: you’ve broken up with someone you’ve had feelings for since you were in your 20s. If she had been, she wouldn’t have left him. Also, do any of you remember those VC Andrews books? bethany Iku was confused by Yori's attitude. Christy We live in the United States in the middle class with 2 parents. Diablo Most likely both are very messed up. She starts him off with the whole pick a card any card routine. Since we were young I’ve always been attracted to “Carol.” When she was a teenager she would tell her friends she loved me “differently.” She called me once crying saying her life was messed up, she moved too quickly, but because she is a hard-headed person, she is sucking it up. Cut off contact and get a therapist. Addie Pray I hope you do too. The basic advice is the same whether you’re with your sister or an unrelated person. Like many of you — the ages confused me. A month ago she kissed me i freaked out and told her not to kiss me. It’s funny that yesterday we were all talking about how we don’t really mind the down-thumbs, but then things like this happen and it’s just disappointing to see individuals targeted like this (I mean, who down-thumbed her most recent?). I thought it was a woman at first, too, and after the initial comments I had to go back and reread to make sure I hadn’t goofed. it’s one thing to start a relationship like this between adults, but if one of them is a minor it’s far different. When I check off things on my to do list outside of daily chores, I feel good. Agreed. The good news is you can break your dependence on your sister and find the kind of love you desire in healthier forms. And B. the therapists on that show said that the emotions of finding a long lost person so connected to you for the first time often will manifest itself with romantic feelings. Yet another reason why people should STOP having a kid or two with each and every partner. jlyfsh Wow. In the moment, it feels good. Intamacy was like none other for both of us. I also want to add that you might have to “shop around” a bit for a therapist. February 25, 2014, 11:15 am. But you need a professional to guide you through that process. I have since lost my job, let myself go, and cry constantly. Hi guys. I thought the timeline was something like he left home when he was 18 (she was 11), came back at 23, when she was 16. She could have been 18 when he moved away for 5 years, or she could have been a teenager of 13. Two weeks later she’s living with another man 11 years older. bethany February 25, 2014, 12:27 pm. She kissed her on the lips so passionately, then Nina pushed her off and said, "We're over, remember?" She's a year younger than me but she has an old soul. February 25, 2014, 4:56 pm. I’m wondering the same thing. February 25, 2014, 12:05 pm. Don’t get caught in the trap of thinking you can never be happy unless she comes back to you. I had really expected this to read “Please pray for me – pray that I not have these feelings anymore.” Idk, wees I guess. Wendy, I love your first line because I don’t want to believe this is real. Diablo Honestly, the first therapist I ever went to, I felt judged and I didn’t care to open up. Perfectly normal. And for that reason, I want to urge the LW to please, please get yourself to therapy. I guess? ktfran However I will say that often people find solace and fulfillment in what they know or should know is taboo because for some reason or another the conventional is not open to them. You and her have a seemingly great relationship/bond that I believe is being mistranslated in some ways. He picks, remembers, puts it back and closes his eyes until Jade says open. Banana You need to focus on yourself and your mental and emotional well-being. I can't stop thinking about her and always fantasize about her. That’s not to say that sibling relationships are OK, I just don’t think the LW should be overly hard on himself or avoid therapy because of the stigma. And I don’t doubt they love each other, but that doesn’t make this OK. (Really, Diablo? Seventeen and ten?) That’s why I wanted to put it out there. That’s exactly the book I was thinking of when reading this letter. READ ALSO: BIZARRE: Man and woman viciously attacked by cat in Migori. New Here? Yori and his twin sister Iku used to be very close as children but lately Yori has grown colder toward Iku and is always eager to stay away from her. Then start doing those things. “I’m in Love with My Sister” I am 50 and my half-sister — we share the same dad — is 43. I really don’t mind *that* much — but I think it could spark some good discussion. She let out a shaky moan as I kept thrusting in and out of her harder now that we both have gotten used to the feeling. It makes sense that you’re a complete and utter wreck after breaking up. WEES. February 25, 2014, 10:17 am. And you know what? Listen to I’m in Love With Your Sister by Chingo Bling. Cause I'm in love with your sister (She's cooking she's looking real firme) Baby please take it easy (I'm in love with your sister) She washes the dishes with soap and She washes my socks and calzones (I'm in love with your sister) No complaining, I'm saying she's staying She even beat me at playstation (I'm in love with your sister) And I’m not saying that to take away from the emotional pain this LW is going through. I then positioned myself so I'm lined up with her, and slowly pushed myself into her. I also want to point something out: even if this were a conventional relationship, it is NOT healthy that you ask us to pray “that she wants to get back together again”. Many break-ups are hard, but the fact that you have had feelings for your sister for over 20 years and your life is now falling apart definitely warrants a good look at how you got here and what to do next. You can learn to trust other people. Here is what you need to do, start thinking about what would make today a good day and tomorrow. bethany February 25, 2014, 10:09 am. I'm in love with my sister and there is nothing i can do about it. peachy I don’t understand how your comment could get thumbs down. After they had gone I saw my best friend Stormy. She isn't my sister by any relation she has just been there for me more than anyone else. I think you need to consider the extent to which you took advantage of your much younger sister, and the extent to which this may have negatively affected her, before you consider your need, your “love.” In therapy. Please pray for me — pray that she wants to get back together again. February 25, 2014, 11:06 am. I really don’t care if you disagree with me, I’m just wondering. February 25, 2014, 12:24 pm. Plus you have weird sibling-bonding chemicals that are interfering with that. I love being with my parents, love sitting at the table and playing cards after dinner with a glass of wine or whiskey. Oma valikute muutmiseks võite igal ajal külastada oma privaatsuse juhtseadeid. You say moved move away for about 5 years after she was a teenager. I’m curious. And you might get lucky your first try. And when you do, your life will open in a way that it probably has not been open in a very long time, if ever. No answering calls, emails, and maybe even avoiding family functions where you might see her. Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / I’m In Love With My Sister (314 Views) (2) Re: I’m In Love With My Sister by HORLADSTAR(m): 1:55pm; hmmn, this one na yawa o. Do you have a nest egg saved up? The desires of the body and the desires of the mind are two completly dirferent things. She swung her arms around my neck and held onto me as I picked up the pase, thrusting in and out of her with a bit more speed. I like how she looks and she has some really cool accessories (she has some really nice headphones that she lets me try on). And Dilan nodded her head. I never knew that she had, had another girlfriend before kissing me. It’s the same advice we have for everyone here, basically. Think of what makes you proud of yourself and focus on those things. Bittergaymark However, I have started being turned on by her. February 25, 2014, 12:33 pm. You can move on. Dear Wendy is a relationship advice blog. So I just want to note that you do not mention how others felt about the relationship. the first time you slept with her she was either still a teen or barely out of her teens, and you were about 30. Let her live her life and move out of the unhealthy role she’s maintained with you for so long. As far back as I can remember, I knew there was something wrong with me. and a woman who became sexually involved with her brother and an indeterminate young age and now is with a different older man (though on the surface there’s no issue with a 43-year-old woman and 54-year-old man, for sure). Bittergaymark Report this. If you love her, then space is the kindest thing you can give her right now. I’ve been speculating this all day. LW, it’ll take some time but I think you’ll be OK! The only reason I’m on my third is that I moved 1800 miles away. right?? I just want to know WHY they don’t like what you said for another perspective. I could see it was painful for her, so I kept slowly pushing in. From the album "They All Want Him But Who Can Afford Him" by Chingo Bling on Napster Please help me. When the bus stopped everyone got off. I, too, think the LW is a woman. Do a handful of projects around your home that you have been meaning to do. I'm in love with my sister. It was the “another man” line that made me think the LW is a man. Read about I'm In Love With Your Sister by ODM and see the artwork, lyrics and similar artists. Yeah, this is not healthy. Are you on unemployment benefits? Flowers in the Attic? Like someone else said, you might need to shop around a little, but I promise you can find a therapist who won’t judge you and will help you through this. Yea, the “another man” comment made me believe the LW is a man. I'm 17 and my sister is in love with me. Lianne ktfran February 25, 2014, 10:34 am, LlamaPajamas February 25, 2014, 10:32 am. The series focus on fraternal twins Yori and Iku, who fall in love with one another despite being siblings. LW, definitely take Wendy’s advice to heart. I am not at an ideal weight but when I put on an unwrinkled outfit and take the time to put myself together, I feel better. NOW. And when I need a sympathetic ear, I always know I can count on you. She orders him around a lot in public and kind of hisses at him if he does something wrong. Is there anyone, besides your sister, who would and/or has talked to you about what’s going on in your life right now? If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at [email protected]. I’m religious and I will say when I broke up with my ex I actually originally was going to pray to get him back…but then I decided to pray for “what’s best for me”. funny how when we’re given ambiguous dates/ages we all kind of fill them in differently.